@Callum @carl123
Ok, yeah, I think that's it. It makes sense to me now, and I think I know a solution as well.
It's not on your list, but the common factor is a little piece of software called "Caffeine." It's just a small utility that runs in the background and uses a key's upstroke every so often to keep the computer awake. I mainly use it while downloading large files from a networked repository, or when I'm installing big pieces of software (Think Autodesk Creation Suite, or allowing a game engine to compress/decompress projects).
The docs say this:
This default can be overridden by a commandline string that will allow the user to set it to another key. Hopefully one that doesn't interfere with running software.
Here's a link: https://www.zhornsoftware.co.uk/caffeine/index.html
I've already tested the theory and this does seem to be the culprit. Turning it off stops the zoom.
I think we can call this "resolved."
Thanks for your help!